I GOTS A LOTS TO SAY, OKAY?

Ladies ... GentleMans ... Miscellanious Pronounes ... It is a day of love! Saint Valentines blessing for pairings around the globe...! And I am not one of them! Nor part of one of them! Or have plans to be!

Some shocking news maybe, but I don't particularly mind! For an identity that leaves me restating the same old boundaries each time i meet a brand new friend, I'm not bothered by the love day! The odd thought comes and goes about relationships but ultimately I find myself quite happy on my very own!

I've never understood it, personally. It's so strange the way some people go about the topic, or about asking people. In all my years of living i have not once found myself feeling different about someone who i am friends with. I have never felt as if they were more or less to me, and trying to tell the difference between feelings for a friend and feelings for a crush would be Sisyphean. I don't care enough to learn, though. Nice as it sounds, that's the idea on paper. In practice though, i just don't think i could see myself doing it. That's a LOT of energy to put into one person, and i would hate to get sick of someone who cares for me so dearly.

Valentines day does not have to stop at just romance, though! Although i do not celebrate it myself, any sour feelings about the holiday could be reconstructed into care for your friends! For people who matter to you! It does not have to be a losing game for anybody! I am not sure what a couple would do on Valentines day that would differ from the average day together, so however someone wants to spend the day platonically is entirely up to them! Buy gifts! Do things! WhatHaveYou!

I am writing this at the end of the day. It may be at midnight, but I myself am attending a birthday party for one of my friends! With the rest of a friend group! Even if it is not within the 24-hours of Valentines Day, i am still content to spend time with the people i am friends with!

JANUARY IS OUT - FEBURARY IS IN.

Two entries in and I already would like to complain! I would love to have one of the million other topics to talk about today, but my brain has been wracked by this One Thing throughout the month!

I am in a college class for animation. However, the class i am in especially is the first ever year group of the course! Which makes us the guinnea pigs of the whole two years. Which means that our two years of the course are all kinds of messy in terms of coordination. Which MEANS that everything we have done so far has been unfortunately very POORLY planned out and we've had very little opportunities to verbalize any feedback!

So, here's the scoop: At the start of the semester we were told that we would be not only pitching, but working on our own individual animations for a competition. We were offered full creative freedom for what we made, so long as it was kept to a maximum of 1 minute. We could use whatever program we wanted that we were comfortable with, work from home whenever needed, we had much more room to stretch compared to the first year (which i had found out was changed to be more freeing for our CURRENT year one's! I Am Not Mad! About This!)

So what happened? Poor management! We spent more time preparing all the behind the scenes junk that wouldn't see the light of day than we did on the competition itself! The sentiment was shared, so i'm fairly confident when i say that giving a group of students SIX WEEKS MAXIMUM to work on their submission is an INSANE request. 48 hours ago i was losing my mind trying to crunch to get it done, and the only reason it didn't meet the full minute was because i was So So stumped on what to actually fill the animation with!

You know how long the script was? 0! 0 Words! Because we didn't HAVE one! Unless you want to count the three sentences roughly explaining the start, middle and end of the animation, we had no real script to go off of! My one frame of reference was a very loosely thrown together storyboard, but otherwise i was pulling ideas out of thin air. Go figure, a passion project no longer becomes a passion project when the student is just trying to reach the finish line.

Did you know we had to log everything we did weekly too? I didn't! I wasn't aware of this because i was following the lead of my peers! The tutor turned around one day and decided to give us directions that would of been useful SIX WEEKS AGO !! We were given prompt questions for us to talk about our project and the process of creating it, but it was chock-full of REALLY REALLY DUMB QUESTIONS ... If i had to pick a hateful favorite i'd elect "How are you making your animation clearer and more exciting?" and "How are you giving your animation movement?" as candidates. I almost wasn't sure if i was writing for it to be read by professionals or 5 year olds!

That will be all for now! Next time i see you i might have some nicer words to say! I think! I hope!

HELLOO. HELLO TO THE PEOPLE ON NEOCITIES. HELLO TO THE PEOPLE WHO FOUND THIS SITE THROUGH SOME FORM OF ME LINKING IT. 3 GRUELLING MONTHS OF FIGURING OUT HTML AND CSS AND WE'RE FINALLY HERE!

At first i thought i was never gonna get AROUND to doing this. I made my account approx.. 4 years ago? Funny thing is I don't even remember having made it! I don't think teenage me had nearly as much ambition to carve herself a space, but times change! They really do!

It's funny too, there's been nothing on the site since day one. If i so much as tweaked something in the files it would count as an entire "update" and tell the whole block. 300+ views is quite the number for a site that has a broken image hosted on discord!

The effort was certainly worth it though. Sleepless nights can go a long way sometimes when you're looking for your own personal spot online! I also get to blabber on to my heart's content about my apothisexuality! They make it too nerve wracking of an environment to discuss it openly anywhere else online. Those folks tend to be the most agitating you can come across. Humor before boundaries! That sort! Who needs em!

CUSTOMIZATION TOO. How many people have already made the point about how social media spaces nowadays all look indistinguishable and bland? I certainly don't need to be the one to tell you! Even if the aid of templates goes against the idea of building a site from the ground up, people have the option to make it look like whatever they want!

I'm hopeful that my motivation to work on this page doesn't dwindle, now that i've a place im happy with posting on! ^_^